This is a Power Ranking of how I think this years fantasy league will play out: Bios and stats for each owner are pulled from the internet and are all factually correct.

10. Chris Manno

Manno made it all the way to the championship last Year. At the cost of all his 2023 draft salary. I respect him for making the moves to put a winner on the field but he is going to have a lot of issues with only $108 draft dollars.

Strengths:

• He is a risk -taker (unlike other losers in here who are afraid to make trades).
• He traded me Josh Jacobs for $8 last year right before he became the best RB in the league.

Weaknesses:

• I don’t know Manno well but I heard he has a sweet tooth and can never resist Pumpkin Pie.

9. Nate Grossman

Let’s face it, Nate is dumb. He doesn’t know anything about football. These are just a few reasons why he will never win. He has $266 draft dollars because he sucked ass last year and will probably blow it all because he doesn’t know ball.

Strengths:

• Works at UPS

Weaknesses:

• Bald
• He is stupid
• Mean
• college dropout
• Not good at golf
• Doesn’t know Ball
• He’s fat but he has no ass
• bad knees
• bad Heart
• Low T
• Favorite artist is Lizzo

8. Cory

Cory drafted two quarterbacks last year even though we are only allowed to start one. He spent $22 on QBs and $60 on Cooper Kupp, is that bad luck or Bad Ball? Hes got $153 and i have a feeling about half of that is gonna go to guys that will spend most of the season on his bench.

Strengths:

• Good Dancer
• Looks good in Black and Yellow
• Italian (Pervert)

Weaknessses

• He loves cookies…a little too much
• cant ride most roller coasters due to their heigh requiremnts
• favorite sport is soccer

7.Alec Bracken

Alec had the best record in the league last year which didnt help him out when it came to playoff time. he has a low salary cap of $154 and a $10 Devonta Smith. If Alec can make some good deals again this year he may prove me wrong (unlikely).

Strengths:

• Has heart and makes good deals
• Makes a killer chicken noodle soup

Weaknesses:

• Said he doesn’t want to raise the league buy in to $1000. So he clearly has no faith in himself.

6. Christopher Dick

CJ is my biggest question mark in this league. I feel like he might know ball but is his heart really in it? With $191 and Nick Chubb he may have this years RB1 on his team.

Strengths:

• He loves the salary draft
• He has a fast car so he won’t ever miss a kickoff

Weaknesses:

• Falls in love too easily
• Will be brutally hungover most Sundays and could forget to set his lineup
• He doesn’t care about fantasy

5. Rick Carey

Even a blind squirrel finds a nut, Thats what happened last year. Ricky is both blind and the size of a squirrel and somehow got lucky enough to win the whole thing…..Kinda makes you wonder how the guy who makes all the rules and controls every aspect of this league won the whole thing…

Strengths:

• Good at pickleball
• Married
• Has influence over the youth

Weaknesses:

• Blind
• Short
• no fashion sense
• Married
• re-wears the same underwear for multiple days
• Lives in Maryland

4. Dark Larc

Larc is a power player this year. With $262 and Chris Olave as a keeper. He looks destined for the playoffs

Strengths:

• Great locker room guy
• Likes to party
• Great Coach

Weaknesses:

• Lives in New Jersey

3. Patrick F

Patty will blow his whole Budget on Steelers and end up winning the whole league because the Steelers will be the No.1 offense in the league.

Weaknesses:

• No car
• has a GF now so he is basically a dead man

Weaknesses:

• Good heart

2. Matt carey

AI generated Imagine of Matt because he may sue me for using a stolen imagine of him.

Power Hungry Monster

Strengths:

• Nerd

Weaknesses

• not verified on twitter
• Has Jonathan Taylor who Isnt even playing the first 4 games. Bed decision.

1. Baker

Im the best

• handsome

Weaknesses:

• Bad knees